The ABC’s of Attachment
As described by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. See book review; Parenting From The Inside Out.
Attachment Parenting; Attunement-Aligning your own internal state with those of your children. Often accomplished by the contingent sharing of nonverbal signals, trust increases. In order to align my own internal state with my child in attachment parenting I must have self-awareness related to how I am doing emotionally and what my mood is. Both empathy and active attention are involved when I am attuned to my child. I am listening, watching, observing and putting myself in the child’s place. Children do not yet know how to monitor their own emotions and needs, the parent can do that when attuned to the child.
Attachment Parenting; Balance-your children attain balance of their body, emotions, and states of mind through attunement with you. As you monitor the child’s emotions, and either provide stabilization or stimulation (as appropriate) the child grows and develops the ability to maintain balance of theor own body, emotions and states of mind. Healthy parents have this ability, intervene on behalf of the child, thereby teaching the child/youth to internalize the ability and maintain balance on his/her own.
For more about this book parenting from the inside out.
Attachment Parenting; Coherence-The sense of integration that is acquired by your children through your relationship with them in which they are able to come to feel both internally integrated and inter-personally connected to others. Internal integration has to do with the different emotions, states of being and needs all being recognized, felt, and working in sync. Inter-personally connected refers to relationship; attachment and bonding are appropriate and in place. Coherence is present when the various states, emotions and needs are interacting with one another and part of the integrated self.
Trust in relationship increases; //www.nydailynews.com/life-style/health/babies-learn-trust-early-age-study-article-1.988582
I highly recommend this book to all parents. As you recognize and work through your own attachment issues, you are healthier and free to cultivate healthy attachment styles within your children.
Call me now to learn more; 949-697-4332